My wife and I had just finished a coffee with Destiny Psencik, a remarkable 25-year-old who heads the equally remarkable Turtle Wing Foundation in Schulenburg, Texas. Destiny told us about Turtle Wing’s efforts to help children with learning problems in our rural community.
We left the coffee joint talking about all the cool stuff Turtle Wing is doing — and how lucky Fayette County was to have Destiny. She’s a native of La Grange who went away to college and then came home. She’s one of a kind, we thought.
Then we thought again – and started counting the number of 20- to 30-something women who were running vital and thriving non-profit groups here.
We ran out of fingers.
Was this area unique in having such a large number of active young women, many of whom were born and raised here? We didn’t know. So, we decided to ask some of these people about their decision to live in this rural place. Their answers are below.
Two things stood out to me in reading what they had to say. First, the community is magnetic. A real community attracts people. And it brings people home if they’ve moved away. Second, all these women found opportunity here. There was important work for them to do.
The writer Jane Jacobs told us that opportunity, not necessity, is the mother of invention. Opportunity also appears to be the mother of community development. You will learn much more from their answers.
Here is our panel:
- Cheryl Pekar, a native of Weimar, Texas, is the executive director of the Stanzel Family Foundation.
- Destiny Psencik, a native of La Grange and executive director of the Turtle Wing Foundation in Schulenburg, which develops programs for young people with learning disabilities.
- Melanie Ramirez, a native of La Grange, is the program director at Stanzel.
- Jennifer Owens, born in Weimar, is the executive director of the Girls and Boys Club of the Champion Valley.
- Susannah Mikulin is the executive director of the Fayette Community Foundation. She was raised in El Paso. Her husband is from La Grange and they live on land that has been in his family for generations.
- Ashleigh Parks is the community impact program director at the Fayette Community Foundation. She grew up in Katy, Texas, on the west side of Houston. Her husband went to high school in La Grange.
Bill Bishop: Tell us about your decision to move to this area. If you grew up here, were you always sure you’d come home or was there something – or someone — that convinced you?
Pekar: I was always sure that I would come home and live here permanently. There was never a thought otherwise. I didn’t exactly have a concrete plan for how to make that happen though; it was more of a “I’ll figure it out” thing.
Psencik: I think I always knew I would come back, yet never really admitted it while growing up here. After attending college, and falling in love with someone who is local to the area, I knew that this was where we should be, whether that was immediately or after we had established careers. Luckily, I was blessed with the opportunity of taking the Executive Director position at Turtle Wing, and we were able to move back sooner than we had thought!
Mikulin: After living in Austin for a decade, where I met and married my husband, we decided that it was not where we wanted to raise our children.
My husband is a La Grange native and after a house became available on his family’s land when I was pregnant with my second child, it felt like very serendipitous timing. So, we made the choice to move to Fayette County.
Ramirez: I get the question all the time – I enjoy this question. I was born and raised in La Grange. But living in Huntsville during college made me open to living in the city. I had the big idea of graduating then moving to Houston or Austin.
Growing up in a place where everyone knows everyone and then moving to a place where I saw new faces every day was a new feeling that I was little-by-little getting used to. I liked it.
A few weeks before graduation, I was looking for a job. I got a number for a potential job in Schulenburg at the Stanzel Family Foundation. I have worked there since 2018.
Parks: I moved to La Grange because of my husband, Caleb Parks. I came to visit on spring break and never left!
Owens: I was born and raised in Weimar, Texas. I always loved this town.
I remember hearing a majority of my classmates saying that they would never want to come back here, but I knew that I did. I was really close with my family so I knew that I wanted to be close to them.
BB: What were the things that affected your decision? A new opportunity? Friends? Family? A sense of place? What brought you here?
Pekar: Sense of community and family were at the top of my list for reasons to come back. I had traveled the state and the nation working with rural people and places, but I didn’t have the same feelings and attachments to them as I had for my home. I would even strategically place some of my work and projects in and around my hometown so that I could be close to home more often.
My husband and I had our son in Huntsville, two hours away from home, and it only took six months for me to feel an even stronger urge to go home. So much so, that I decided to move back home with our son, while my husband continued to work and live two hours away. We did that for two years.
“love grows best in little houses, fewer walls to separate. So close together, can’t help but communicate. And if there was more room between us, think of all we’d miss.”
Our parents are older and I wanted so badly to raise my children around them and also for them to grow up with the same experiences and values I grew up with – hard work, farm life, genuine care for others, knowing your neighbor, your cousins, who their mom and dad are, who their grandparents were, what businesses they owned, where they worked, what kind of people they are and so on.
Ramirez: Coming back to my hometown has been the best decision. I have been able to continue growing personally and professionally. The people I have met have been such a treat. We are so united here. I am extremely lucky to be a part of this moving force.
Mikulin: Unlike many wanting to move back home, we were provided the opportunity to purchase land and a house from my husband’s family, which meant it was reasonably priced and nowhere near what it would cost in the Austin area.
This decision was easy for us, especially with the thought of our children being the 5th generation raised on the land and producing life from the same soil as their great-great-grandparents.
Pekar: I was awarded a Stanzel scholarship out of high school. As a part of that scholarship, you are required to “return home” twice a year to check in with them, share your GPA and schedule, and just catch up on your accomplishments and goals.
Those short, 15-minute meetings, twice a year, were what “kept the knot tied” to my community. I was able to stay in touch and learn about local opportunities to get involved.
I felt wanted, I felt like I belonged. They helped to make the picture and plan a little less fuzzy.
Stanzel also offered me a job. But even if they had not, I know that it would have been a connection that they helped me make, that would have led to another job.
PS – I’d like to see rural communities worried about brain drain, implement this simple 15 minutes, twice a year, visit plan with high school graduates. It’s an idea.
Psencik: Being raised in a very close-knit family I think overall made me want to end up back in La Grange. But when my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer in the Fall of my freshman year of college, I think it really solidified that I never wanted to be too far from home.
I used to think that there was nothing to do here, no culture, and that it was full of crazy, far-right politics. That is absolutely not the case and I regret ever making those assumptions.
Luckily, for the next few years, I only had to be an hour’s drive away. My position with Turtle Wing has allowed me to turn that hour drive into a “minutes” drive.
Parks: Like I said above I came here because of my husband, who moved to La Grange his freshman year of high school and moved back when he graduated from Texas A&M in 2017.
I knew that I did not want to move back in with my parents and after dating someone for five years you’re ready to finally be together in the same town.
Owens: I graduated from Texas Lutheran University in December of 2015 with my Bachelors in Communications and a minor in Public Relations. I got a marketing job for a funeral home in Victoria. My dad was the funeral director in Weimar for over 40 years, so this industry was not new to me.
Although Victoria wasn’t that far away, I just never felt as comfortable there as I did in Weimar. I came back in August of 2017 to pursue a different job, but unfortunately the day I came back, the job fell through. I applied to multiple jobs and went back to work at Subway/Texas Burger in Weimar, I had worked there throughout high school and college, just until I found something.
In November, I was told about an open Resource Development position at the Boys & Girls Clubs of Champion Valley, so I applied and got the job. In 2018 I was promoted to Executive Director. I became extremely passionate about this organization and was so grateful that the opportunity came into my life.
BB: What are the biggest challenges that you’ve found? Are there amenities that you are missing? Or services? Friends? I hate to bring it up, but politics?
Pekar: Of course, amenities are missing, but I don’t care. We do without. Or we don’t even know what we are missing out on. I’m sure that means we are “sheltered,” but I’d like to think that others are sheltered from our experiences as well.
I would like food delivered and more things for children to do or go to. But for everything that’s missing, there is a bonus. No traffic. Short commutes. Safe schools and daycares. Genuine relationships with business owners and others.
Our parents are older and I wanted so badly to raise my children around them and also for them to grow up with the same experiences and values I grew up with – hard work, farm life, genuine care for others, knowing your neighbor, your cousins, who their mom and dad are, who their grandparents were…
During disasters like freezes or hurricanes – we don’t lose power, we don’t have to shut down, and even when we do, we already know how to take care of each other and we are efficient at it.
Mikulin: As excited as I was to move to the country and enjoy being a stay-at-home mom who prepares farm-to-table food and continues the “hippy” lifestyle I enjoyed in Austin, I quickly understood that I was just that — an “Austin Hippy” haha.
I experienced very real culture shock when I realized how spoiled I had been with the abundance of natural food stores like Wheatsville Co-Op and Whole Foods just down the street or restaurants that catered to vegetarians or clean eating. Yes, I also very much miss Target, too, and always will.
Psencik: I think having to reacclimate into a small town after having lived in larger areas is one of the biggest challenges. But it is also the biggest blessing. In this area, as with other rural areas, everyone either knows each other, is related, or knows someone who is! It’s a blessing in that you rarely meet a stranger.
But I think we can all get caught up and “stuck” in the same mentality. There are so many different opinions, priorities, ways of life, etc. in larger areas, that I think we sometimes forget what’s outside of our own “little worlds!”
Also, never getting to make a “quick trip” to HEB [the Texas-based grocery chain] or Walmart because you know you will see someone you know and have to stop for a chat…but in today’s fast-paced way of life, this is sometimes the only way you can catch up…so it is a blessing as well!
Mikulin: I did not know a single soul and found that since it was an election year (2016) and everyone had signs in their yards, I was very much in the political minority. For the first six months living in Fayette County I was hesitant to make friends and found any excuse to visit Austin just so I could escape back to my comfort zone.
It was not until I started the Fayette County Community Theatre, which I honestly did to make friends and find my people, that I regularly spoke to anyone other than my in-laws. FCCT saved me on multiple levels.
Parks: The challenge I had when first moving here was finding a job. I had to commute to Austin every day for over a year for work until I finally found a job in La Grange.
I can say living in a small town I save more money than I did living in Katy [Greater Houston] because of being close to the mall and having access to other department stores. I have a shoe problem.
In two weeks, my husband and I will be welcoming our first baby into this world and we want her to grow up in a close-knit community. That is far more important to us than money.
Friendships weren’t a big challenge because Caleb grew up here and I became friends with his friends and their significant others. I knew when I moved here that I wanted to find something of my own. So I joined a Bunco group with ladies from church and the school district. Caleb was also a part of the community theater, so I became friends with them as well.
Owens: The biggest challenge that I have had was a personal one.
My dad passed away on January 14, 2021, and 17 days later my mom passed away. I was extremely close to my parents, so losing them both was devastating. I also had to make a decision because my dad left his funeral home to my brother and me. I had to decide if I wanted to pursue that or sell it and stay with the Boys & Girls Club.
Ultimately, I made the decision to leave the Boys & Girls Club and pursue a career as a funeral director. I have completed my schooling and am currently running Hubbard Funeral Home with my brother. But in August of 2022, I made the decision to apply back to BGCCV as the Executive Director. I was hired back in September.
I am currently running the funeral home with my brother and I am the ED for the Clubs. While this may sound crazy, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Pekar: Politics – yes. I lean left in a right-sided world. But I think that is a good thing. It requires me to know and understand other perspectives and logic and accept them because I also know the actual person I’m interacting with. It requires us to disagree but still get along.
Kind of like living in a small house… “love grows best in little houses, fewer walls to separate. So close together, can’t help but communicate. And if there was more room between us, think of all we’d miss.”
It’s a song – one of my favorites, and I just realized the metaphor as I wrote this.
Parks: This is kind of funny to say but a challenge I had when first moving here was the coffee shop not being open on Sundays. I hate to admit this but I definitely drove (20 miles) to Giddings for Starbucks on Sundays for a while.
BB: You could likely make more money in a larger city. How do you figure the gains and losses resulting from your choice?
Mikulin: Honestly, knowing the impact that my work has made on our community fills my heart with so much joy that I would never leave just for more money.
Living in a smaller community provides me the opportunity to do my job even better because it’s so much easier to know our needs and resources, and connect with individuals who want to help. In a bigger city, doing similar work, I don’t feel as if I would know all aspects of the community as intimately as I do here.
I feel so blessed that I can be having lunch at a restaurant on the square and in the hour I am there, talk to my donors, grantees, community stakeholders, and friends as they pass in and out of the doors. That would never happen in a big city and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Psencik: I was raised to follow my passion, and hopefully I would be able to make a sustainable living in doing so. Turtle Wing has allowed me to continue my career doing exactly that, and luckily, I get to do it in the area where I grew up.
Sense of community and family were at the top of my list for reasons to come back. I had traveled the state and the nation working with rural people and places, but I didn’t have the same feelings and attachments to them as I had for my home.
That being said, my job would not be as enjoyable and fulfilling if I was doing it anywhere else. The support and guidance I receive from the community has been instrumental. The sense of family and the “have your back” mentality of this area is truly inspiring, and I don’t think you can find that in larger cities.
I would rather do something that is fulfilling and serving a purpose for the community that I love than have a higher-paying job in a place that I have no connection with.
Parks: We have a lot of friends in Austin and Houston and watch them constantly go out on weekends and during weekdays. Granted they’re supporting local which I support but they are consistently talking about how they have no money because they “had” to go out with their friends, aka they have fear of missing out.
Also, their need to always have the newest and trendy things I just don’t understand. So, I feel like rural teaches you what your true necessities are rather than living in the city where it’s label based.
Owens: Sure, I could make more money in a bigger city, but I wouldn’t be happy there. I’ve never liked big cities.
I also have to think about my growing family. In two weeks, my husband and I will be welcoming our first baby into this world and we want her to grow up in a close-knit community. That is far more important to us than money.
BB: What has been the biggest surprise and what have you learned living as an adult in a rural community?
Pekar: I still don’t know everyone and I meet new people all the time. There are so many people (natives and non-natives) who have so much to offer, I am always surprised and excited to get folks engaged.
Ramirez: The number of nonprofits in the area. There is much overlap, and we encourage and help each other. I have seen the good and the bad and been on both sides. I feel so attached to our communities. We all have something to bring to the table.
I am proud of where I came from.
Mikulin: The possibility to live a fulfilling life is very real in a rural community.
I used to think that there was nothing to do here, no culture, and that it was full of crazy, far-right politics. That is absolutely not the case and I regret ever making those assumptions.
I am constantly attending events, volunteering with amazing nonprofits left and right, found “my people” but also learned to listen to others with different viewpoints, and have what I consider to be the best job in the universe.
Coming back to my hometown has been the best decision. I have been able to continue growing personally and professionally. The people I have met have been such a treat. We are so united here. I am extremely lucky to be a part of this moving force.
I have grown so much as a person in the time I’ve lived here, in so many ways, and for that, I am forever grateful.
Psencik: Professionally, the biggest surprise has been the support within the nonprofit community.
I know that I can pick up the phone and call any other nonprofit leader in the area and they will pick up on the first ring. The guidance, support, and love that the local nonprofits share with each other is remarkable, and I know that it has truly helped me in my young career.
Parks: The biggest surprise I had when I moved here is everyone is so nice and welcoming! I was so sure everyone would point their nose away from me since I wasn’t from here.
Another surprise was how much this community truly cares for one another… Working at the foundation, I’m constantly amazed by the support in our community for its people and organizations.
For example, the school resource officer’s wife passed away due to cancer on top of their son being born at 20-22 weeks. This town came together for this person (who isn’t from La Grange) and raised over $20,000 for him and his family.
Owens: I can’t really say that I’ve had any surprises coming back to a rural community as I already knew what a caring community Weimar is.
I’m proud to be a part of a community that is so giving. I am also a part of the Rotary Club of Weimar and am on the Weimar Chamber of Commerce board so I am thrilled to be able to give back to the community that built me.
Psencik: Living as an adult in a rural community has been a completely different experience than when I grew up here.
Personally, I think now that I understand and have witnessed the world around us and all of the chaos, I have learned to appreciate the place that I grew up more than ever.
Mikulin: I still miss Target.
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